Honor the ebb and flow

Honor the ebb and flow

Is it just me or is there a general feeling of overwhelming on social media? Anyone who runs a business seems to be under constant pressure to take this course, that workshop, read this book, hire that expert, etc.

I recently read a comment on a Facebook group that procrastination was another term for laziness. There doesn’t seem to be room for rest, relaxation or contemplation allowed – you have to go, go, go!

Social media madness

I understand that I am generalizing here and that there are people who appreciate the ‘go slow’ and ‘grow organically’ approach more, but are not as easy to find as highly motivated and motivated individuals who never seem to stop. to breathe.

My Facebook feed is now full of sponsored ads instead of posts that I would like to see related to the people I am connected with. An increasing number of YouTube videos (and now Facebook videos) are interspersed with ads, to such an extent that I constantly saw the same people asking me if I wanted to be successful, be rich, travel the world, love myself more, etc. – so often in fact that I find myself annoyed by the intrusion – he / she once again got in my way seeing what I had chosen – a bit like an uninvited and unwanted party guest.

Now the trend is videos and Facebook Live (and probably others that I have not noticed yet, they move very fast). This is great when people have something important or interesting to say, but my feeling is that some people feel pressured to do so for fear of being left behind and becoming invisible in the face of the ‘Look at me’ culture that is being created. . I have seen more than one live FB session where the person is rambling with nothing important to say, or spending their time talking to their friends who are watching. I don’t mean personal posts that are meant to be just for fun, but real business owners who are trying to promote their business and are probably doing more harm than good because they haven’t structured their sessions.


The underlying feeling that I pick up from all of this is panic and lack of control. The world of social media is wonderful: there is so much information at our fingertips, but it can also be brutal if we don’t control ourselves.

It takes an inordinate sense of self and inner peace and calm not to get caught up in the whirlwind of life online. Any doubt or lack of self-esteem pounces on – so many people want to ‘fix’ us, make us better people (in whose image do I wonder?) And generally become the next big business success. Most of the time we can become mere puppets in the online game of life, with our limbs moving in all directions so as not to miss the “next big thing” that will bring ultimate success.

So what is success? If the success for you is in the millions in the bank, then there is a lot of pressure to achieve that goal, especially if we focus on making it happen more or less instantaneously. What price are we willing to pay for it? Are we sure that we will achieve happiness and success with an overflowing bank account?

However, if success is happiness, then I think we need to be able to skip the tape every now and then, take time to do things we enjoy, or not at all if that mood takes us. We have to understand that we need to balance our lives: nothing in nature is constantly being pushed. Taking time in quiet contemplation, or procrastination, is just as important as moments of high productivity and focused intention. This doesn’t exclude millions in the bank, it just means we’re not exhausted or approaching a nervous breakdown when we get there!

No attachment

Detachment from the result is a concept that not everyone accepts, but it can be the key to releasing stress in all areas of our life. Realistically, none of us know where a new relationship, business, job, home, etc. is. It will take us, if it will bring us what we want or imagine, or something different. There is an element of risk in all of this. There is always a greater plan for our lives that is beyond our control.

Who says that a new relationship is not just a means to introduce yourself to the person you are really destined to be with, or that the new job is not going to push you to the limit to make the decision to follow your real dream? We just don’t know, and it should be.

I remember when I lived in the Algarve, I taught English and did tarot and graphology sessions. I was approaching local hotels with the idea of ​​becoming an inside reader so they could offer something different to their guests, but I was having absolutely no luck. I started looking further afield and shortly after I was offered a job as a resident reader at a golf and leisure club in Vale do Lobo. This involved a 1.5 hour bus ride each way several times a week. At the time he didn’t understand why he could only get a steady job at Vale do Lobo, but a few months later it became clear. Circumstances changed and I had to leave the apartment I was living in and, being July, it was very difficult to find alternative accommodation. What was featured was a beautiful ocean view villa, just a 20 minute walk from where I was working at Vale do Lobo. No one will ever convince me that there is no better plan at work, beyond our individual understanding.


Each of us is different and my message is truly that each of us should run our businesses (and our lives) in our own way. If we are open and use our intuition, the nuggets of wisdom and a definite direction will become apparent and we will be internally driven to do whatever it takes. That could be downtime: a day watching Netflix or taking a trip to the beach, or a day spent interacting on social media, doing accounts, or writing an article. For example, I had no plans to write this article when I woke up this morning, inspiration suddenly hit me and Hey Presto!

Some of you may have seen a recent video about Adele’s early life. What surprised me the most was that when I was a teenager, a friend of hers demoed some of her songs and submitted it. Two years later it was discovered and Adele too, and the rest is history. I’m a big believer that things happen when they’re supposed to, and as long as we do our best, are authentic, our time will come!

My last tip is: Enjoy your business / life, manage it in a way that makes you happy, do the best you can, take the time to relax, take the advice that resonates and discard the rest, collaborate instead of competing and watch. and see where it takes you. Amazing things can happen when we are willing to let go of constant control and follow our natural ebb and flow.

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